Conversation with God today

I am walking down the road. Thinking about my body and the need for exercise to help me fully heal. Other than that my mind is pretty unoccupied. Because my Lord loves me, He chose that moment to engage me. I might have ignored this. I might have assumed it was my own mind. I didn't. I assumed it was God because I am in a relationship with Him and I know that He wants to talk with me every day, every hour, every moment. His voice is soft, gentle....true.

God: Your heart hurts
Me: Um
God: Your heart hurts
Me: I guess so
God: Your heart hurts
Me: I wasn't directly aware of it
God: But I am. Do you know why?
Me: (thinks for a few moments) Yes

(insert private conversation between me and Him as to the whys)

Me: What do I do?
God: That thing I showed you when you were struggling, do you remember?
Me: Yes
God: That was my answer to your question
Me: It was beautiful, but I don't know how it helps
God: Focus on what I show you in those moments when you are struggling. That is what you need.

I am at this point walking along hard packed dirt road, looking for God's beauty because this is what He had showed me, the beautiful creation.

God: Look up, the beauty is not in the hard packed road. Look under the cholla or the tree. See all that is there? There is an entire micro-climate of life under there, protected by the tree, the cholla, underneath the organic litter. Life and beauty exist there. Look for it. Look for life, the life I provide in Creation. You are made to be moved by that life, not the false life that presents itself so readily in your mind's eye. Look for the real life, the life that I have created and provided to inspire and encourage you. Not the stuff that man has created, the stuff I have created.

Me: Ok

Walk some more, arrive home, walk into the back yard to feed the birds. I'm not intentionally asking any question at all.

God: I didn't ordain for you the hard, painful things that have happened.
Me: I know that
God: Don't listen to those who say that I did.
Me: Ok
God: They have taught that I ordained every bad thing that has happened. That is a lie. I WILL work all things that happen, including the bad ones, for your good. You love me and I do that for you. But I didn't ordain them.
Me: Thank you for taking the time to remind me of that personally today.